
1. Who is this? Fucking John Stamos is who it is! Don’t deny the yearning your body demands of his presence.
2. Probably one of the few reasons we all decided to watch Full House was because of Uncle Jesse. I mean come on! He was UNCLE JESSE! The one who had the nice hair, tanned skin, bad boy persona, and the fact that he was/still is a fuckin’ fox.
3. Check out those pearly whites. That smile will make your legs go all jelloid. Like I-fucking-can’t-move-right-now-because-I’ve-become-immersed-in-the-rays-of-sex-that-your-body-is-sending-off-right-now jelloid. That fucking grin! Holy mother of goodness I believe my panties just magically came off my body…
4. He can pull off The Scruff exceptionally well. Like all the damn time. Seriously ALL the damn time.
5. Can we play doctor? Like right now John? My legs are still jelloid. Can you fix them for me?
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